+972-52-8710337 druttman@futureweb.ws

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter 

Impossible to do


Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, expert says 

No crap, really?


Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 

Now that’s taking things a bit far! 


Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over   

What a guy!   


Miners Refuse to Work after Death

No-good-for-nothing, lazy so-and-so’s! 


Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

See if that works any better than a fair trial! 


War Dims Hope for Peace 

I can see where it might have that effect! 


If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

Ya think?! 


Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures  

Who would have thought!?


Enfield (London) Couple Slain;  Police Suspect Homicide  

They may be on to something! 


Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?  


Man Struck By Lightning: Faces  Battery Charge

He probably IS the battery charge! 


Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Do they taste like chicken?


Local  High School Dropouts Cut in Half

Chainsaw Massacre all over again! 


Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Boy, are they tall! 


Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Did I read that right? 


I picked up this collection of headlines and comments somewhere. What can I say? Proofreading is important!